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Why Do We Hurt Ourselves?

By January 13, 2016Blog

A wise teacher asked me the other day; “what would happen if I placed a hot stone in your hand?” I replied; “I would drop it.”

I thought about this question for hours afterwards – what the metaphor was. Why would we automatically (before thought) drop a hot stone if it was placed in our hands? It’s obviously because we are DESIGNED, by our very nature to let go of what hurts us.

How good are you at letting go of what is hurting you? Why does our mind formulate a story making it feel so impossible to let go of what our bodies are rejecting?

I’ve been thinking since my 23rd birthday last week what the “rites of passages” are moving into my 23rd year – this in between age where you’re learning that the choices you made as a teenager now have implications, and yet still don’t feel like an adult. It’s been especially difficult for me because everything I achieved that seemed so impressive at 18 and even 21, is starting to become ‘standard’ – and more than that, expected. Through this transition I begun comparing myself to my friends of all ages and asking myself questions like; “are these thoughts/battles that my friends my age are facing?” “Am I over analysing it?” “What do my 30 year old friends lives look like, or my 40 year old friends?” “What happens If I make the ‘wrong’ choices now?”

I thought about this until my head was swimming and I had to take a step back. You know what? Comparison is a slow form of suicide. I’ve always thought that, and yet in times of vulnerability the curse of comparison seems to always sneak its way back into my life. I know, however, that the only true path to success is to focus on your own journey and flow. It’s not about what he did or she did – it’s about what the next obvious step is for you, regardless of anything or anyone else.

I bring this into the conversation because the more I reflect on this, the more I see that comparison is, in so many instances, the biggest pain point for people. With beauty, money, assets, friendships, milestones, travel, style… etc. And yet, when you are truly and authentically connected to you – you will realise that even though we are all connected, you are completely unique. What proceeds this realisation is the ability to freely express yourself – and once you’ve mastered the art of expression, what does not serve you will no longer by in your life. You won’t remain in a disempowered place, allowing your hand to continue clenching a hot stone, when your whole body is screaming at you to drop it. Comparison is merely just a series of thoughts that you do NOT have to attach or conform to. Do not be a salve to your mind – tune in to your nature, listen to your truth and follow your flow. Suffering is a choice. Choose peace, choose love, choose to listen to the innate wisdom inside of you.

Our very nature teaches us this. Listen.

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